28: [Video] Hot For Teacher
Oct. 9th, 2011 09:37 pmSo, uh. It's come to my attention that whenever events roll around, everybody's usually running through the halls like chickens with their friggin' heads cut off. So today we're gonna fix that, 'cause this is what I do for a living.
[It appears that Dean is in the kitchen, and has covered an entire countertop with assorted objets d'hunting.]
Got a coupla basics here. Salt. [He lifts up a canister of the stuff.] Purifying chemical compound. Burns ghosts, but won't keep 'em away for long. You can protect yourself by drawing a circle with it and stayin' inside. Iron- [Dean gestures to the crowbar.] Also purifying, harms malevolent spirits.
[With a click, he's got a Zippo lighter out and lit.] Whole bunch of stuff is gonna hafta be burned. [Out goes the lighter.] Usually the remains of a dead person, so you might get your hands dirty, fair warning.
[Dean pockets the Zippo and leans in for a dramatic close-up on the camera.]
Where I come from, monsters are real. And they're not about to go away - especially not in Wonderland. You can either sit here with your thumbs up your asses, or be ready. I'm gonna take questions about whatever stuff you wanna throw at me, so knock yourselves out. Class is in session.
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 04:36 am (UTC)He's surprised to find that thinking of Amy doesn't make him want to lock himself in the closet and gouge his own heart out. It's just saddening; an ordinary, hollow kind of saddening.
He's surprised to realise that that's the first time he's thought of her in a while.
All this thinking, on the outside, only takes a moment. ]
I stayed human for that, [ he says with a small amount of relief. Alex counts himself lucky there, even if it did mean half the mansion was drooling over his papercuts. ]
I know the obvious stuff didn't work on all of them. There aren't any vampires where I come from, so I went off legends. [ With Tim van Helsing and his hat. Oh god, the hat. ]
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 05:33 am (UTC)[Not that he cut off Philip's head, or anything. Just wounded him a little.]
One thing the suckers can't stand? Dead man's blood. If they get that in their system, it paralyzes 'em. Just for future reference.
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 05:37 am (UTC)Blood from a dead guy? [ Getting that would... so not be the worst thing he's ever done, so it doesn't faze him. ] What kinda vampires is that for?
[ Since he doesn't remember that from Nosferatu. And yes, he's totally writing this down. ]
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 06:07 am (UTC)[Sexy vampires? What are those, anyway? There's nothing sexy about gargling blood while someone chews on your jugular.
...or is there?]
Werewolves aren't actually hairy, either, in case you were wondering.
[Dean chuckles.]
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 06:08 am (UTC)[ At least the trees don't stalk you. Probably. ]
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 02:31 pm (UTC)[And honestly? He wouldn't. Even though it would mean a normal life, even though it would mean having a whole family instead of a broken one.
It wouldn't be the same.]
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 03:38 pm (UTC)But apart from general spook-repelling lessons, he has a definite goal for this conversation. ]
What about ghosts? Spirits? What if there aren't any remains?
[ Not that he knows exactly what the 0perator is, but let's start with possible basics. ]
[audio]
Date: 2011-10-10 11:52 pm (UTC)[~The More You Know~]
no subject
Date: 2011-10-11 12:08 am (UTC)But he carries on asking as if this is all theoretical. ]
How d'you find it? They're not gonna hand you directions.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-13 08:29 pm (UTC)What do I look like, a P.I.? You gotta look everywhere, dude.
no subject
Date: 2011-10-13 08:46 pm (UTC)Alex looks frustrated for longer this time. ]
What if there isn't a body?
[ If the Operator ever had one, and he doubts it, it's not going to be in Wonderland. ]
no subject
Date: 2011-10-17 03:49 am (UTC)Then you might be up shit creek. There are other methods, but some of 'em hafta be looked up. Kinda like exorcisms and banishing rites.